Thanks For What?!

Okay so I am going to just come out with it and say what no one does…Thanksgiving is a crock! Well at least for me it is. See I work that holiday then have to get into my car and drive across the state to eat dinner late while my family watches me waiting to wash my plate. This is all after I have sat in Turnpike traffic and have a nice case of road rage, a great feeling on a holiday. Plus I am not a fan of turkey; well not at least in it’s whole original form. Me, I like my turkey either ground or from the deli. This might all stem from the fact that for years my aunt held Thanksgiving dinner and…well…ugh I’ll just say it; she served dried out turkey! Plus I think pumpkin pie is just nasty, and I must not be very American (another story in itself) because I think apple pie is boring. Plus what do you do on this holiday? Everyone eats then the men disappear into a room to monopolize the TV watching sports and the women clean up, now what is there to celebrate about that?

This is not to say that I don’t like all the flavors of Thanksgiving in general, but I have had to come up with creative ways to ingest them, because hell will freeze over before I put a turkey in my oven. Now I am a stuffing freak, bread or meat; and I love cranberry sauce. (Now that I had a break from it after my sister made me eat two cans of it in two days.) And then there is my grandmother’s Chocolate Lush. Ahh Chocolate Lush just typing it makes my mouth water; but alas even though I can give you the recipe it will not be as good as hers is. (Almost everyone in the family has tried to make it with sad results.) And never, never try to make this in a lighter version, it just doesn’t taste good at all!

First I will start with a meatloaf recipe that brings together all of the flavors of Thanksgiving in a form that I can easily make one any day; and I call it Thanksgiving Meatloaf. (Really original, but if you can come up with a better name let me know.) Begin by combining a one pound of ground turkey, one egg, two tablespoons of Dijon mustard, half a cup of breadcrumbs, one diced celery stalk, one diced onion, one small diced apple and two teaspoons of poultry seasoning. Mix this all well and spoon half of it into a loaf pan, top with cheddar cheese and then cover the cheese layer with the remaining turkey mixture. Bake this at 350 degrees for between thirty and forty minutes; do not over bake because you don’t want dried out meatloaf. While the loaf is baking mix together half a cup of whole berry cranberry sauce, three tablespoons of sour cream and two tablespoons of dried chives. Once the meatloaf is done serve the sauce drizzled over it for perfectly balanced results. This meatloaf tasted like a mix of turkey and stuffing, oh so good!

Next I want to share one of my favorite meals, which I actually make a lot during the holiday season. This is a recipe for open-faced turkey sandwiched with all the trimmings. Beware you will dirty every pan you own and then some to make this meal; but that’s why we have dishwashers, right? Start with making some homemade applesauce from four pealed apples of any variety you like which you cook down with a splash of lemon juice, two tablespoons of sugar and a teaspoon of cinnamon. Once the apples have cooked down into mush stir in around a half of a can of whole berry cranberry sauce and let this simmer away until ready to serve. In pan number two boil three fairly good sized diced sweet potatoes until soft and falling apart. Drain these and return them to the pan to mash them up with a splash of half and half, two tablespoons of butter, half a teaspoon of cinnamon, salt and pepper. Moving on to pan number three for the stuffing to end all stuffings. Begin by removing some store bought maple flavored uncooked sausage from their casings and sautéing them in a little olive oil. Dice up two stalks of celery, one small onion and half of an apple and add that to the pan, sauté until soft before adding a teaspoon of poultry seasoning. Add about a cup of bagged cubed breadcrumbs and enough chicken broth to moisten everything to your desired consistency. Remove the stuffing from the pan and keep warm so that you can make gravy without dirtying another pan. Begin by melting down two tablespoons of butter and then add two tablespoons of flour. Cook this for a few minutes so that it does not taste like wallpaper paste before you add two cups of chicken broth and whisk until thickened. Season this with a teaspoon of poultry seasoning, salt and pepper. Now add some thick slices of deli turkey breast to the gravy to heat it up while you toast up some slices of whole grain bread. (You can use white bread if you really want to but I wouldn’t be caught dead putting a slice of Wonder bread in my mouth). Okay so now to assemble this fantabulous meal place the slice of toast in the center of the plate, cover with the warmed up turkey, spoon out some sweet potato and stuffing around the sandwich and drizzle gravy over everything. Don’t forget about the cran-apple sauce. This recipe makes a ton of food, but you will need the energy to tackle the dishes piled up in your sink; plus the stuffing is good the next morning with eggs and you can pour the leftover cran-apple sauce over ice cream.

Chocolate Lush has been a holiday staple in my family for as long as I can remember, made from my grandmother’s recipe. Well at least she had us fooled for about twenty years that it was her recipe; come to find out that the original recipe was given to her by her sister. This is pretty much the only dessert I eat on the holidays and there are never any leftovers, plenty of nasty pumpkin pie but no Lush. Okay so here it is good luck making this and if you need any feedback just bring me a bit for quality control. Begin by mixing with a fork one and a half sticks of softened butter with one and a half cups of flour and half a cup of walnuts. Press this mixture into a nine by thirteen inch pan and bake it at 350 degrees for twenty-five minutes. Remove it from the oven and let it cool completely. Beat together one eight-ounce package of cream cheese until smooth before adding one cup of confectioners sugar; once again beat until smooth. Gently fold in one cup of Cool Whip and spread the mixture on top of the browned crust evenly. Mix together two packages of instant chocolate pudding with three cups of cold whole milk until thickened. Spoon the pudding on top of the cheese mixture and then top that with the remaining Cool Whip in the container. Sprinkle the top with a few walnuts and chill well. I have heard that people make this dish with lemon pudding instead of chocolate but have yet to see or taste it, so as far as I am concerned that is an urban cooking myth.

This year I have to wait until Christmas to get my Chocolate Lush fix as I am forgoing the road rage drive to eat by myself to spend the holiday with my boyfriend’s family. It is going to be tough missing the Lush but I think that I can make it another month; at least I hope I can.


Thanksgiving Meatloaf

1 lb. Ground turkey
1 Egg
2 Tlbsp Dijon mustard
½ cup Breadcrumbs
1 stalk Celery, diced
1 sm Onion, diced
1 sm Apple, diced
2 tsp. Poultry seasoning
½ bag Shredded cheddar cheese
½ cup Whole berry cranberry sauce
3 Tlbsp. Sour cream
2 Tlbsp Chives, chopped


Combine the first eight ingredients well and transfer half of it into a loaf pan. Cover with the cheese and top that with the remaining meat mixture. Bake at 350° for 30-40 minutes. Combine the cranberry sauce, sour cream and chives into a sauce to drizzle over the meatloaf before serving.


Cran-apple Sauce
4 med. Apples, pealed and diced
1 Tlbsp. Lemon juice
2 Tlbsp. Sugar
1 tsp. Cinnamon
½ can Whole berry cranberry sauce

Combine the first four ingredients in a pot and cook over low heat until broken down. Add cranberry sauce and combine well, simmer until ready to serve.


Mashed Sweet Potatoes

3 med. Sweet potatoes, pealed and diced
¼ cup Half and Half
2 Tlbsp. Butter
½ tsp. Cinnamon
Salt & pepper

Put the potatoes into a pot of cold water, bring to a boil and cook until soft. Drain and add the remaining ingredients to the pot, mash well.


Maple Sausage Stuffing

1 pkg. Maple flavored uncooked breakfast sausage
2 stalks Celery, diced
1 sm Onion, diced
½ Apple, diced
1 tsp. Poultry seasoning
1 cup Cubed breadcrumbs
¾ cup Chicken broth

Remove the sausage from it’s casing and sauté over medium heat. Add the vegetables, apples and poultry seasoning and cook until soft. Stir in the breadcrumbs and moisten with the chicken broth.


Almost Instant Gravy and Turkey

2 Tlbsp. Butter
2 Tlbsp. Flour
2 cups Chicken broth
1 tsp. Poultry seasoning
Salt & pepper
Deli turkey, sliced thick

Melt the butter and stir in flour, cook for a few minutes. Whisk in the chicken broth and seasoning, bring to a boil and let thicken. Submerge the turkey in the gravy and warm through. Serve over toast.


Grandma’s Chocolate Lush

1 ½ sticks Butter, softened
1 ½ cups Flour
½ cup Walnuts, chopped
1 8-oz. Pkg. Cream cheese, at room temperature
1 cup Confectioner’s sugar
1 tub Cool Whip
2 pkgs. Instant chocolate pudding
3 cups Cold milk

With a fork mix together the butter, flour and nuts. Press into a 9x13” pan and bake at 350° for 25 minutes, until browned. Beat cream cheese until smooth, add sugar and beat again. Fold in 1 cup of the Cool Whip and smooth over the cooled crust. Beat the pudding packets and milk until thickened. Smooth the pudding over the cream cheese, cover with the remaining Cool Whip. Sprinkle with some more nuts and chill well.